Wednesday, June 9, 2010

How to "Parent" Adult Step Children. Is It Possible?

How To "Parent" Adult Step Children. Is It Possible?


Q: My husband and I each lost our spouses after more than 30 years of marriage. We’ve been married for three years. I have three daughters and he has three sons; all are married adults. My daughters have embraced my second husband, but two of my husband’s sons have never accepted me. I’ve tried very hard to get to know them and be warm and friendly. They are rude, mean and rejecting, and it hurts me deeply. My husband has talked with these two sons about their behavior, however, he also tiptoes around them because he doesn’t want to lose his relationship with them (nor do I want him to). I’ve told my husband to go without me to “his” family functions although this doesn’t seem to be the right thing either. What are your suggestions for smoothing out this precarious triangle? Do you have some recommendations to help resolve these family-relations issues.

A: Al and Ramona have been married 58 years. Here’s what they say:

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