Stepgrandparents usually enter into a family in one of two ways. They marry someone older when they are older and they get a huge package which includes stepchildren and stepgrandchildren. Or, their biological child marries someone who has children from a previous relationship and voila, they get new stepgrandchildren. Either way, I’ve talked with people in this situation and manytimes they are confused about their grandparent identity and/or their role. A lot of the time the responsibility falls on your shoulders to “keep a finger in the pie.” Let’s face it, you can still act like the typical grandparents—rile up the kids, have fun at their parents expense, and then go home. What do your stepgrandchildren call you? Is it OK to call you by your first name or refer to you as Aunt or Uncle? If their four other biological grandparents are still around do they really see you as a Bonus or as an odd extension to the family? So, all you stepgrandparents out there—let me hear from you. What are your experiences?
Dr. Rick
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